Square Dance

Hey!
Do you want to square-dance with me? Seriously, I bought new boots from Ray's Boots and Bait. They're a little snug to be sure, but if you accept my invitation you could help me break them in. Aw come on darlin, don't walk away. Look will you at least let me buy you a slice of pie? Yeah? That's swell, I mean seriously that is great news! Tell ya what, I know this little place not more than a hop and a skip from here, what do ya say? Boy howdy! I sure like that answer! You know you have a beautiful smile. Your very welcome. You look a little chilly, here put my coat on. Whats that hon? Yeah my dog sleeps on it. Those spots on the cuffs? Well Babydoll has a problem with anal leakage. You sure you don't want the coat? Alrighty, if you change your mind let me know. Ah, here we are, "Chunky's Diner." Here let me get that door for you sweetheart. How about that booth in the back? Great! Oh hon what did ya sit in? Oh thats just a little of Chunky's brown gravy, it'll wash out with Tide. Ok, you can have my seat. Don't say I never gave ya nothin. Yes waitress we'll have two slices of Chunky Pie. I'll have a cup of the house coffee also, you want anything to drink darlin? No? Alright just the coffee and pie then. Nice place ain't it? Ok? This place is what America's about. Late night pie and coffee, I can't think of anything better... that is except being able to share it with such a beautiful woman. Is that a blush? Oh, its poison sumac? I hate that, itches like the Dickens. Oh here comes the pie. Thank you ma'am. Go ahead darling eat up! Good ain't it? Oh that tangy flavour is the lemon peels. Gives the pie an extra zing, don't you think? Sure you don't want a cup of coffee? Alright, just remember I offered. You know I don't know whether its the weak flourescent lighting, or the smoke of cigarettes and burnt pork products in the air, but darlin, you have never looked better. Pardon me darlin, this coffee's gettin to me, I gotta go drop the kids off at the pool. Wow, ten pounds lighter. You didn't finish your pie honey. Not hungry? You women and your dieting. I say there ain't nothing wrong with a big woman, as long as she's proud. Do you need a ride anywhere? Good thing, cause I'm not sure I could fit you on my bike. It's a 94 Huffy. Yup just replaced the ball bearings last Monday. It's a smooth ride. Oh you have a Mercedes? Well, I don't reckon I could ask you for a ride? No I know, It was wrong of me to ask. Well it was a pleasure meeting you darlin. You take it easy now, don't forget ole Red now ya hear? All right, take care sugar. Another cup of coffee waitress! And may I say, you are the most beautiful waitress I have ever seen...