Insomnia is a brutal monster. I have battled it since I was a child. Its affects have left me listless and wan throughout my day. It is 4:00 am currently and I just did something I haven’t done in years. I took a drink of alcohol. Not much. A small swig of scotch. This is really bad gut rot stuff too. Left to me by a pedophilic friend of the family. Memories. I took that drink as an aid to help me build this life of mine. And the life I’m seeking to construct is one that depends on me getting sleep and having energy throughout the day to perform the necessary tasks. On a completely unrelated note, where the fuck is that Malaysian plane? I think it’s a huge viral promotion for the new Godzilla movie coming out in a few months. I just imagine that plane flying a little too low over the ocean and that giant lizard beast leaping out of the water to snatch that sucker down like Deon Sanders. He’s even got the bandana on. He swims that plane to the bottom of the ocean, pulls up a few feet before his hits the ocean floor and dances with it. Hits the ocean floor and spikes it. It would be unbelievable marketing. Genius, really. But seriously, I feel sorry for those people and their poor families just stuck, nothing to do, no news about where a giant jet disappeared to. What else is on my mind while this tiny bit of alcohol takes effect? Oh, I know. My alma mater has made it to the Sweet Sixteen of the NCAA Men’s Basketball tournament. It was great to get a number one seeding but to cash in and at minimum make it to the sweet sixteen is great. If we make it to the national championship game I’m going to be in Charlottesville that night. And if we win I’m going to be tipping over hybrid cars and setting fire to latte stands and throwing wheatgrass at people. It’s going to be a blast. Honestly I’m just glad those white supremacists at Duke are eliminated. I know they have some black players on their team but those players are usually light skinned and the student body is mostly whities. Playing on Koach K’s Kourt. I think my biggest problem with Duke is that aged toddler they have coaching them. First of all he pronounces his name in no way like it’s spelled. Stop that. It’s pronounced like Crizz-ooski. Stop making it difficult for me to type demeaning tweets about you because I can’t spell your fucking name. Also, I just hate his face. His normal face is fine but when he disagrees with a call it twists all up into this awful ball of adolescent angst. It looks like he just sucked on a lemon while simultaneously having a large fist shoved up his ass. Ugh. But he is a great coach and I kid the Duke University people. They’re not white supremacists. Not all of them. Just the ones that require sunblock. Alrighty well I feel the effects of some of Scotland’s worst flowing through my veins and I’m pretty darn sleepy. I might do this again. I hope not, but we’ll see.